Breathe.Gratitude.Love.

The signs of change surrounded me like the four winds.  This period of time had carried me as far as possible.  It was time to move on from past consequences of mindless behaviors and into new possibilities. 

I took inventory of the things I fought for on the inner battlefields of turmoil and peace, aggression and surrender, resentment and acceptance, depression and expression.

The four winds brought to remembrance the treasures of my journey.

The South Winds

Behind me were the days of trying to make things work that were never even meant to be.  I held the glow of transformation released from the exchange of the life I thought I wanted for the life standing before me.  I grounded myself in gratitude and freed my energy from emotional pain and endless resentment.  I removed the “they did me wrong” sign from around my neck along with the heaviness of its weight.  I transformed challenges into lessons in preparation for the future.   

Behind me were the days of being thoughtlessly overtaken by anger.  It is my choice to quickly acknowledge my feelings and choose a compassionate release.  It is my responsibility to seek realignment after every misstep.  It is my responsibility to be kind to my neighbors, thoughtful with my words and gentle with my actions.  The space for seething anger is now closed.  My heart for compassion grows wider with each sunrise.  

Behind me were the days of self-judgment and judgment of others.  I am who I am and I let others be who they are.  It is not up to me to change anyone, not even myself.  It is only up to me to respect each journey, including my own.  It is up to me to protect my energy, even if that requires distance from loved ones.  I can only share my journey and learn from the journeys of others.  I can only send my love and gratitude throughout the atmosphere for those who wish to receive it. 

The East Winds

From the right blows the wind of wisdom obtained throughout the journey.  The journey revealed deeply seeded past traumas causing present-day harm.  It granted me the softness needed to rest and recover.  It gave me a respite from the ever mounting pressures of society.  It gave me a mirror to see my true condition and a chance to clear the dirt and debris left by past hurts and pain.  It gave me the chance to look into the mirror and say “I love you” for the first time ever.    It gave me the space to learn who I am for myself along with a chance to forgive myself.  It gave me the chance to see that everyone who has ever played a part in my life did so from the love they had available.  For all these things, I am grateful.

From the right blows the wind of empowerment through Reconnection with my feminine energy.  I am forever bonded to the silent places within from which all things manifest to serve my being.  I am bonded to the quiet inner energy that allows my written and spoken words to ring with power.  I stand forever within the light that allows me to see beyond the veils of limitations.  My knowledge, my worth, my value and my fortitude are grounded in the innate IS that is my being.  The depths of my compassion softens the most hardened hearts.  The feathers floating from my gentle words breaks the spells of hatred and reveal the love buried within.  Thank you Divine Mother.

From my right blows the wind that reveals my energy as a sacred color to be spent lavishly in creating the beauty that supports my life.  I measure the energetic worth of my activities that they may all serve my highest good.  I withdraw my energy from people, places and circumstances that would cause me harm.  I use my energy to uplift myself, my family, my friends, my tribe and my community.  My energy connects with nature in service to the good of humanity, the animal kingdom, the Universe and all living things.  I respect the energies of others through healthy boundaries, meaningful words and respect for each journey.

The West Wind

From the left blows the winds of honesty and integrity.  I constantly seek the mastery of my own life that I may show up as a dependable partner in every relationship, regardless of how fleeting it may be.  I resolve issues to the best of my ability and ask for help with things beyond my grasp.  I lead with a heart of service and inspire others to operate from the fullness of their capacities.  I give with ease as my heart remains in an overflow of love.     

From the left blows the winds of security and trust.  I set my goals to match the security of the sun, to be reliable even from behind the  clouds.  My dependability endures even in the absence of acknowledgment from others.  I extend warmth to those in need without expectation of reciprocity.  I trust in the goodness of others as I trust to be the best possible version of myself in every moment.  I trust in the Divine to unfold my path with gentle compassion and friendship as I offer the same to those around me.  I trust the parts of the journey that are shrouded in mystery, that they contain the goodness that I strive to share each day.  

From the left blows the winds of meaningful focus.  I prioritize the  mundane tasks that nurture clarity and creativity.  I bring creations to life through alignment with the truth and the dedicated works of my hands.  My tasks are finished to completion as I keep my focus on a fruitful outcome.  I remain balanced in raging storms with the tethering to my goals.  I steady myself with third eye sight and trust the vision slowly coming into full clarity.  

Into the North Wind

The north wind calls me to reconcile what I have learned with the adventure that lies ahead, yet this moment is bittersweet.  It is hard to move on from the beautiful treasures that were hiding inside of me.  I have asked the Divine more times than I can count:  “Do I really need to move forward?   Is this really the right path for me?”  The answer has remained the same.  Yes, I must move forward.  Yes this is the right path.

So I gather the things I know for sure as an offering of passage into the promised land revealed to me in visions.  A life created from the miracles of everyday choices to show up better, to take responsibility for my energy, and to accept the same grace that I extend to others.  A life beyond anything I have ever known or imagined.  A life that challenges me to show up with even more grace and compassion.

 I approach the north wind with the things I know for sure:

I’ve had it with my old story.

The desire to ring the same bells of anger, depression and frustration is gone.  I have turned in my suffering badge of honor.  I don’t care who thinks what, who did what or who has what.  The story of the past is old, dull and uninteresting.  I am ready to fly into something new and interesting, something worthy of the energy gifted to me daily.

I’ve done my work.

The work is done.  I have forgiven everyone, including myself.  I no longer need to cling to past hurts as a way to remain connected to the people with whom I have separated.  I can now bask in the fond memories that comforted me in their warmth when the world felt cold.  I can remember the sparks of human connection that changed moments of life into moments of living.   I can thank everyone I’ve ever known for being a part of my journey.  I take with me these memories as I move forward with my life from a healthier perspective that better serves my well-being.

I accept myself for who I am.  

I accept that my weight fluctuates, my skin gets dry, my nails are not fancy, my body temperature  is sometimes hot and cold at the same time and that I talk to strangers.  I accept that I sometimes feel awkward and shy.  I accept that my room gets messy, my stomach isn’t flat, and that I always sleep through my alarm.  I accept my faults, my mistakes and my occasional stubbornness.  

I accept my walk along the path of inner-reflection, even when it gets lonely.  I accept the tears that fall out of nowhere.   I accept my shortcomings as opportunities for realignment.

I embrace the unknown journey.

I welcome and embraced the unknown as my path.  I rely on the wisdom of each choice as the next revelation along my journey.  I choose to focus on the task in front of me and I trust the Universe with the details of how my life will unfold.  I focus on the light within and have faith that it will be reflected outwardly in a pleasing manner.  I absorb the goodness of the present, pay gratitude to the memories of the past, and look forward to a brighter future.  (Thank you).

I have something beautiful to share.  

The adventure of life is ongoing, and there are infinite lessons to learn.  Still, I can share the lessons of my past to connect with others who share similar obstacles.  I can share the evidence of a life transformed from bitterness and anger to gratitude and joy.  I can share my decision to choose creative consistency over excuses.  I can share the ability to move past a limiting story line and into a future without limitations.  I can share the movement of a timid, people-pleasing girl into an empowered woman as the hero of her own story.  

This season of healing has taken me as far as I can go. It is time to move into something new, to release the old story and make room for new adventures from an expanded state of awareness. I am grateful for the season past and I look forward to the things to come.

It is released.